I do not hate you (an open letter)

I got an e-mail from a longtime fan who is also a Mormon, who was deeply offended by my screed about Proposition 8 passing.

I did try to respond in a way that would walk the difficult tightrope of standing by my point and making it clear that my gripe was not with people like her, but I probably failed; I usually do in such situations.

But, to the rest of you, Mormons and everyone else, my gripe is never with you individually. I want that on the record. I mean, yes, as an atheist, I think what you believe is ridiculous and improbable, but there pretty much isn't a religion I don't think that about, which is how I wound up becoming an atheist in the first place. I'm not singling you out.

You know, I bet we atheists have to listen to more crap about our (lack of) beliefs than any other group. It's still considered basically okay, or at worst mildly offensive, to say horrible things about us, things you wouldn't dream of saying about even the most maligned religious groups in the country. I'm used to it, really.

So, to the woman I offended, well, I'm sorry I offended you, and I'm sorry for the crack about the underwear. But, it would seem you basically agree with me about proposition 8 passing. Understand that, whatever offense you felt reading a blog entry from a basically powerless person that said not-nice things about your church, it surely is nothing compared to the offense that I and millions like me felt when millions of supposedly decent and upstanding people voted like modern day George Wallaces last week.

And I suppose, what I want to know is, why doesn't that offend you more? Why aren't you livid with your church for having provided 40% of Yes On 8's funding, presumably the difference between passage and failure? You say you have gay and transgender friends...why are you, apparently, angrier with me for saying something you agree with in an intemperate way than you are with your church for doing something you seem to feel is a profound and terrible injustice?